I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
And then my night got REAL pukey
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I'm really busy with my period
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
