I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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