you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize