I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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