I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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