I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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