what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
