Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
