The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Randomize