I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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