The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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