Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
