Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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