Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
