If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
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