I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
it's like iHOP with fire
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
