even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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