I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Randomize
