Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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