so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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