I'm really into asian looking animals
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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