I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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