Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
