i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours