I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
