it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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