Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
