this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Randomize
