You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
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