I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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