so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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