I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize