you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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