I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy