But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Even my vagina gasped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize