Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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