no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
You are a genius and a whore.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize