$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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