But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
