Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
