Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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