How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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