I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
wanna go halves on a baby?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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