Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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