Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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