So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
