I would go down on you faster than GM stock
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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