its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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