what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.