Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
In America we eat man semen.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
