He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
